


When I needed it

by cockabeetle, Kymopoleia



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: I almost forgot, M/M, Trans Female Character, Trans Male Character, dont think too hard about it, help lance help him, i need to not update things after like no sleep, lance also has issues but we'll get to those, look at all of the things im doing with my face, mentions of an oral kink, oh yeah, pidge is trans btw, shiro is also trans here, shiro is fucked up, trans!lance is a thing here
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-26
Updated: 2016-08-15
Packaged: 2018-07-18 09:47:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 18,768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7310059
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cockabeetle/pseuds/cockabeetle, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kymopoleia/pseuds/Kymopoleia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Here, drink this."</p>
<p>Shiro blinks in surprise, glances at the bottle, and then up at Lance, and then back down at the bottle. After a few seconds, he takes a sip, eyebrow raised.</p>
<p>The potential was there, but Lance groans. "No, no, like, um, like when you're breathless and drinking it with *gusto*, you know?" He flaps a hand. "Not like that, man."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Lance was dying. Not literally, but it felt like it. Shiro was... Every time Lance saw him, his eyes gravitated to Shiro's mouth, and that was when he died. Lance couldn't articulate it, but something about the way Shiro's tongue flicked out, the way his lips moved, the bits of teeth, any time Lance saw the glistening of saliva... He was gross. Really really gross. He usually tries to focus on something else, but finally he got sick of it and just... Walked up to him? He swallowed and pulled Shiro aside and asked him. "Hey, can you stop doing that, um, that thing with your mouth?"

Shiro had been reading some things Allura had given him, when Lance pulled him aside. "With my... mouth? I'm not... doing anything with it? At least, not on purpose? What exactly are you referring to?" He bit his lip, frowning.

Lance only barely hides a whimper, hitting Shiro's bicep. "That. The mouth thing. Any of it! All of it! I don't know, I'm just having issues focusing."

Shiro's frown deepens, and he shifts slightly. "I'm... sorry? I'm not actually sure what you mean. I wasn't... doing anything? What am I doing? How do I help?"

Lance puts his face in his hands. "You keep putting things in your mouth and licking and sucking on them and it's so so distracting, okay?"

Shiro blinks. He shifts his stance again, and tries to remember what he's put in his mouth. "...Am I... not supposed to eat things? I'm... I'm not following." He almost wants to ask to switch to Japanese, but he's sure Lance doesn't speak it, and he's not sure if trading one language barrier for another will even help.

Lance curses in Spanish. "Yes, you can, I'm not... I'm not saying it right, I should just... Ugh, where's a Balmeran mine for me to throw myself into?"

Shiro tenses, and surges forward without thinking, grabbing Lance's shoulder and looking the younger male right in the eyes. "Just because I'm not following your problem doesn't mean you should commit suicide, Lance. Just... use different words."

"What?" Lance wanted to laugh, but he also wanted to scream. "What, no I didn't actually mean... Um... I can't say it, I'd have to show you, I don't know how to do it, okay?" He shrugged. "Okay?"

Shiro relaxes a little. "Alright. I assume since you dragged me out of a public space it's something private? Maybe we should move to somewhere with a door." He glances around then, arm moving to wrap around Lance's shoulders loosely.

Lance whined a little, but didn't argue. "That's fine? Where were you thinking?" He glances up at Shiro, but has to quickly look away because mentioning the mouth made him focus on it and he didn't want to be gross, he just wanted to chill and... fuck.

Shiro hums and starts walking. "Personal quarters? If that's alright with you. Allura and Coran don't monitor any cameras in those."

Lance's face heats up. "Wait, are there cameras in there?" He asks, voice wavering. He'd... done some really weird stuff in there. And he had some surprise-gifts half knitted and... oh no.

Shiro shrugs. "There are cameras all over the Castle, in case of intrusion. Coran and Allura don't monitor them all the time, and the rooms the five of us have chosen are off limits for privacy reasons. Which is why I was suggesting them. Is mine alright?"

Lance nods distractedly, letting himself be led. "Yeah, I don't know, that's just freaky? Like.. What if they'd had cameras in the rooms at the Garrison? There would have been so much freaky stuff, Shiro."

Shiro shrugs again. "You get used to being monitored. Coran's all but disabled the cameras, though, after I told him about human's privacy and decency laws. You don't have to worry about people watching what you're doing in private quarters, they're private quarters."

Lance sighs in relief, shoulders sagging under the weight of Shiro's arm. "Okay, but it's still kind of weird." He shakes his head. "Anyways, yeah."

Shiro squeezed him closer in a one-armed hug, and led him the rest of the way to his room. "I suppose. Since we're alone, now," he closes the door and lets Lance go so the younger male can walk around as he pleases, "why don't you... show me what was bothering you?"

Lance steps in, blinking awkwardly. He's... in Shiro's room. Not alone, but with Shiro, which is arguably worse. "I'm... um..." He grabs a water bottle and turns, handing it to him. "Here, drink this."

Shiro blinks in surprise, glances at the bottle, and then up at Lance, and then back down at the bottle. After a few seconds, he takes a sip, eyebrow raised.

The potential was there, but Lance groans. "No, no, like, um, like when you're breathless and drinking it with _gusto_ , you know?" He flaps a hand. "Not like that, man."

Shiro blinks again, and thinks for a second. "Do you mean when I'm dehydrated? Or after a workout?" He's a bit confused.

"Yes, both." Lance nods. "Both. Drink like that."

Shiro shrugged, took a breath, and knocked back the bottle. He didn't manage to drink all of it, a little under a quarter left when he pulled back for air. "L-like that?"

Lance was pretty sure he was wet right now. Like honestly, seriously, straight up going to die wet. "U-um, yeah." His face is just so goddamn red, he has to look away. "Yeah, like that."

Shiro nodded a bit, frowning. "I... suppose I can try and avoid doing this, but there are going to be times when I'm going to need water and will end up..." He trails off, not really knowing how to describe the action other than 'drinking it'. He frowns.

Lance just... He turns and goes to the bed, flopping down on it. "Its useless. I give up. I'm not going to ask you to stop-" He coughs. "Drinking anything ever. It's not something that can happen, you know?"

Shiro glances at the bottle, almost wanting to ask it for answers, because it seemed more likely to come from an inanimate object that the teenager currently lying on his bed. "Right. What... else, do I do that bothers you?" He glances at Lance a little worriedly. He didn't want to upset the kid.

"Anything that goes into your mouth." Lance replies flatly. "Just- let's stop for now, okay? We can't get it done." He shifts to peek out at Shiro. "I'll just suffer in peace."

Shiro frowns again. "I'm not just going to give up because it seems difficult to fix. Not everything I... do with my mouth is distracting, so I just need to figure out what's safe and work from there. Yeah?" He nudges Lance with the bottle gently, so he has room to sit down.

Lance pulls his knees up to his chest to give Shiro room. "I'm not going to make you try to fix issues caused by my... my kinks." He looked away awkwardly. "Okay? That's the issue."

Shiro blinks in surprise, and mouths 'kink' a couple times, as if trying to remember the word. "What do... what do kinks have to do with anything? I'm... confused."

Lance shifts to look at Shiro. "Shiro, man, you're smart. Think about it." He replies.

Shiro runs a hand over his face. "English isn't my first language, Lance. It's been a long year, and I've been doing a lot of things, and I just... I really don't understand."

Lance wants to scream. Is that an option? He presses his face to Shiro's pillow, which is an issue because it _smells_ like him. "Kinks. Interests. The oil that turns my gears, what do you want me to phrase it as? This isn't my first language either, Shiro."

Shiro grumbles a little, and rubs his face again. "I... oh." The oil metaphor made sense, suddenly, and his face burns. "Ah. I... see."

Lance groans. "Dying of embarrassment sounds really nice right now, Shiro." He mumbles. "Can we just give up?"

"Wh-" He growls a little under his breath. "I'm not going to give up just because it's a... delicate subject matter. We just have to figure out a way to fix it. You asked me for help and I'll do what I can. Alright?"

Lance blushed impossibly more, shifting so that he's laying on his side, almost curled around Shiro with how his back is arched. "Shiro, I really don't think..." He shakes his head. "I don't know, there isn't anything to do. I'm gonna be stuck thinking about your mouth too much and now you know about it and..." He groans, stealing the pillow to press his face into it again, muffling his next words. "Why's life hard?"

It takes Shiro a few seconds to figure out what Lance said, but he sighs when he does. "Lance, I'm not just going to give up. I can figure out how to... fix it. I'll just have to... think more carefully about what I'm doing." As if he wasn't already hyper-aware of what he's been doing with himself since he was rescued from the Garrison. He'll just be more aware of his mouth, now.

Lance removed the pillow to stare at Shiro. "No, don't." He groans as he sits up, sitting cross-legged and right next to Shiro because that's where his legs had been. "Don't... I don't know how to say it, but don't force yourself." He sighs. "I mean, the only things I can think of to maybe fix it are all dumb and wouldn't work."

Shiro frowns again. "Lance, there's no such thing as a dumb fix to a problem. If it works, it works, and if it didn't, at least there was an attempt made. Tell me." He runs his good hand through his hair, keeping the prosthetic in his lap.

Lance looks away to stop himself from sighing like a schoolgirl over a crush, because he didn't want to feel like that. But he swallows and manages, albeit mumbled and not clear at all, to say the idea out loud. "Well, um, m-maybe if we tried to kiss or something..."

Even straining his hearing as hard as he can, he couldn't make out what the other paladin said. "...Come again?"

Lance coughs, looking instead at Shiro's bicep. "W-we don't have to, but maybe if we kissed and stuff I wouldn't... focus as hard." He repeats, still quiet but more clearly.

Shiro blinks. "Ah. If you're comfortable with that, I don't see what we can't try it." He turns to face Lance a bit more, vaguely wondering when Lance had grabbed his pillow.

Lance sets the pillow down, looking up at Shiro. "Wait, seriously? You don't think it's stupid or whatever?"

"I told you, if you think it'll help, I'm more than willing to try. I have no objections, so if you're comfortable doing it, we can try. Alright?" He smiles a little, eyebrow raised slightly.

Lance nods, one hand lifting to touch Shiro's chin then slowly slide back until it was fully cupping Shiro's cheek. He wants to gasp out a soft 'holy shit' at how comfortable it is, how Shiro's chin has the slightest stubble that he'd never gotten himself, how trusting Shiro looked. Lance shifts until he's up on his knees, hesitating but still there. "Yeah, yeah, it sounds.." He swallows, eyes flickering back down to the cursed mouth that had started it all. "Alright."

Shiro's smile widens just a little, and he just leans forward a bit with a hum. His prosthetic is moved back to keep out of the way, and his good hand comes up to squeeze Lance's shoulder.

Lance surges forward to hide the noise that had wanted to bubble up at the firm squeeze, pressing his lips loosely against Shiro's and trying to.. something. It wasn't a very good kiss on his end, he didn't get far enough often enough to make him good or anything, but Shiro didn't pull him back so it felt... kind of nice?

Shiro just hums again, gently pressing against Lance and letting him decide how the kiss goes. It's to help Lance, so it doesn't really matter if it's good on his end. But a kiss is a kiss, and anything positive is good in his book.

Lance deepens it a bit at the positive reaction, letting their lips slide against each other. Reflexively, his tongue darts out to lick at his lips, and he blushes, thinking too hard about everything he does and every touch and brush.

Shiro opens his mouth after a second, just letting Lance do whatever Lance needed. He's not sure if returing the favor would help, since him doing things with his mouth started this... conversation.

Lance almost went in, but then he remembered the situation and jerked back, hand sliding off of Shiro's cheek to cover his own mouth. He felt like he'd taken advantage of it and- he turns and tries to stand, seriously considering that Balmeran mine right about now.

Shiro blinks and glances around before grabbing Lance's hand loosely with his prosthetic. He hadn't meant to, but he carefully doesn't think about it as he asks his question. "Lance? Is everything alright? Did that help?"

"It... it just made me want more." He admits slowly, head turned so that Shiro can't see the blush on his face, the grit of his teeth, the panic in his eyes. What's wrong with him?

Shiro sighs a little. "Alright. Well, if you ever need anything, you know where to find me. Whether it's something as small as a kiss or a word or two. Yeah?"

Lance relaxes a little. "Seriously? I didn't... take it too far? You weren't uncomfortable?"

"No. It was... nice. If you ever need anything, just ask. Alright?" He smiles a bit, and runs his good hand through his hair again, pulling his prosthetic back and holding it carefully in his lap.

Lance turns, and he isn't gritting his teeth anymore and his eyes aren't panicky. "Really?"

"Yes," He smiles a little wider, and scratches the back of his neck. "Is that your only question?" It's a little amusing, but he doesn't want to forget that he was trying to help Lance out during this conversation. Even if they hadn't actually solved any problems.

Lance hesitates. "Can I ask you a question, then?"

Shiro nods. "Of course. What is it?"

"Can I kiss you again?"

Shiro laughs a little, but shifts to be facing Lance a bit more. "Of course. All you need to do is ask."

Lance does let the sigh out as he practically slides into Shiro's lap, more focused on getting close and starting up a kiss because fuck, he looked so cute when he laughed. Lance lets this kiss almost pick up where the other one left off, moving his lips and tongue similarly and trusting Shiro to respond in turn.

Shiro's prosthetic is pulled back and away before he even registered where Lance ended up, his good hand coming up to cup the back of Lance's head. He meets the kiss just like he had before, though he lets his tongue do a bit more than he'd allowed earlier. Lance was clearly expecting him to keep up, so he did as expected.

Lance lets his mind drift off of the kiss, because while he had been fixating on Shiro's lips pretty heavily, the action was also keeping his own mouth busy. So he settles in on the other paladin's lap, getting comfortable and letting his thighs spread to bracket Shiro's hips. And, beyond that, one arm is thrown around Shiro's neck, the other resting on his chest but ready to move if Lance felt like it.

Shiro hums softly, tilting his head a little to get a better angle. The hand cupping the back of Lance's neck moves down his back, because he's a little bit worried about Lance falling off. Lance weighs like nothing. He could blow away in a strong wind. Maybe they should keep him on a leash, on certain planets. He'll need to talk with Hunk about this.

Lance leans into Shiro, the weight of the hand on his back nice and comforting. The kiss is getting almost sloppy as he dives more and more into it, moaning slightly at Shiro.

Shiro hums into the kiss, eyes closed as he just lets Lance lead. He rubs circles into the small of Lance's back as they kiss, enjoying the sensations and the... positive feeling of it, really. He should do this sort of thing more often.

Lance had just been sinking into it when there was a knock on the door. He didn't really register it that well, but he heard it and froze, a small confused whine coming out.

Shiro tensed, and then without thinking picked Lance up and shifted the younger paladin off of his lap so he could stand. He got to the door, wiping his face with his good hand, and opened it with a small sigh. "Yes? What is it?"

Allura hadn't seen Shiro around for a bit, so when the question of where to go next came up she decided to seek out his counsel. Luckily, he'd been in his quarters. "May I come inside?" She asks, smiling warmly at him.

Shiro tensed again, and gave Allura a slightly awkward smile. "Ah, sorry, it might be better to talk sometime else? I'm a bit busy, at the moment. I'm in the middle of some... thing."

Allura blinked at him, glancing past him to notice a pair of legs sprawled on his bed. She blinks at him and turns. "Oh- alright then, I'll um, leave you to it. Just for... um... so I don't try to find them, who's that?"

Shiro coughed. "Lance had a problem we were trying to fix. We'll join the group once a solution has been... decided on. Is that alright with you, Princess?"

She nods, turning and feeling more at ease. "Alright, good luck. And..." She raises her voice slightly. "Good luck with your problem Lance!"

Shiro closes the door slowly, pressing his prosthetic to his mouth without thinking, and then freezing there for a second before slowly putting it down. "Sorry about... that."

Lance had been starry eyed the second he'd been picked up and dropped back down on the bed, and he'd been so surprised that he couldn't move or reply to Allura when she called to him. He does manage, however, to cough at Shiro. "It's... you're fine."

Shiro shakes himself a little, and steps away from the door, rubbing his face with his good hand. "...mm. I... where were we?" Allura interrupting made it feel... awkward, suddenly. Damn.

"Well, I was in your lap..." Lance trails off, feeling the awkwardness.

Shiro sighs. "Yeah. Unless you want me to pick you up again, or move a bit, I don't really see how that's going to... happen, again." He glances at the younger paladin's face, running his good hand through his hair.

Lance hums and shifts, spreading his legs a bit more. "You could always get on top of me, and that'd be close enough, right?" He props himself up with his elbows, and maybe he's a bit desperate but it's nice.

Shiro froze, and... while the idea didn't sound bad, the first thought that flashed through his mind was when he'd stabbed Matt and climbed on top of the kid to 'threaten' him. It was the last time he'd been on top of someone, or at least the one that stood out as important. "Ah..." The idea itself doesn't bother him, but... he's... he'll try, if Lance doesn't mind it. And he can see if it still bothers him later. "If it won't bother you?"

Lance nods, lifting one hand to beckon Shiro closer. "I don't mind, it.. it sounds nice." He offers a smile. "Are you bothered by it?"

Shiro shrugs. "I'm... fine." He slides onto the bed and kneels between Lance's legs, prosthetic hand moving to the edge farther away from Lance's hip to brace himself up. Good hand hovering at about Lance's shoulder. "...Still good?"

Lance wraps his legs around Shiro's waist, arching his back up into him. "Mhm. It's good." What he doesn't say is how good it feels to have the weight over him, how heavy Shiro is.

"Alright..." He smiles a little, and it feels... weird, to suddenly notice how much smiling he's done in the last... twenty minutes? Thirty? He shakes his head and leans down, stopping just shy of kissing Lance because he's... not actually sure if that's what Lance wanted, or if it's something else this time. They didn't specify.

Lance leans up to close the gap, one hand finding Shiro's cheek and the other sliding around his waist, holding them together. He might be a bit... needy, right now, but if he is it's only because he's never been touched before. Speaking of... if he wants it to go farther, and he probably will, because he's young and it's easy to rile him up, he'll need to ask Shiro.

Shiro hums into the kiss again, eyes closing and just leaning down into it. Now that kissing is happening, all thoughts of Matt have fled and he doesn't feel so... bad. Scared, anxious, guilty.

Shiro seemed to relax over Lance, and while Lance didn't want either of them to be tense, he has to shift slightly under the other man. He doesn't feel trapped, per say, but he is pressed between Shiro and the bed, which gives him a firm feeling of nowhere else to go. Which, he has to say, is actually kind of nice. He seems to be discovering more kinks with Shiro than he'd planned on there being.

Shiro's good hand moves away from Lance's shoulder, down toward his hip so as to let the younger male get out that way if he needs to. He's careful to keep his thoughts on the 'now' and the immediate future- Allura wanted to talk to him about... something, and once they were done he'd need to follow up on that- but for now he was... content. He hums again.

After a few more seconds Lance remembers that he needs to breathe, and he pulls back to tip his head back for a second, breathlessly laughing at himself for forgetting something like that. Then he leans back up and steals a kiss from the corner of Shiro's mouth.

Shiro breathes slowly, and chuckles a bit at the kiss at the corner of his mouth. He presses a light one to Lance's cheek, and sits back slowly, prosthetic hand pulled back and tucked behind him, good hand running through his hair. "...We should probably meet Allura and the rest of the team for whatever she needed."

Lance wants to pout. He might even actually be pouting, but he doesn't want to admit it that. "Do we have to? She... she said she'd find someone else to talk to. We'll find out later, you know?"

Shiro sighs. "I promised her we'd come meet with the team. Albeit after coming to a solution to your problem, but... if nothing else I've made it clear you can come talk to me at any time. Doesn't matter the hour or what I'm doing. Alright?"

Lance nodded, but he could feel a sudden spike of... nervousness almost? What if Shiro didn't actually like him, and just viewed it as a problem to be taken care of? He may pale, but he doesn't say anything.

Shiro runs his hand through his hair again. "I don't want you to feel bad or awkward about any of this, alright? I... You're part of the team, and I care about you. If you have any more problems or questions you can talk to me about them."

Lance let go of Shiro, letting himself fall back against the bed. "Is this just a 'problem' to you?" He finally asks.

Shiro blinks. "Uh. You aren't just a problem to me? You're my fellow paladin, and you needed my help. Is it supposed to just be a problem?"

Lance doesn't know how to word it right. He... He kind of wants to date someone. Shiro, preferably, so that he can get more kisses. But he doesn't want to ask for it.

Shiro scratches the back of his neck. "I haven't really been part of a team like this before, but... I'm sure we can talk about this with all of them if we need to? I... don't know what you're anxious about, right now."

Lance groans loudly. Why does everyone have to be oblivious? Keith sucked at words and jokes, Shiro sucked at understanding 'I want to date you', and Coran didn't understand what 'let me help you' meant.

Shiro flinches a little, and rubs his face. "I'm not used to interacting with people again I... enough has been going on that subtleties have kind of been the last thing on my mind. I apologize, I've been working on it but I..." he trails off, not sure how to finish the explanation.

Lance shook his head. "It's fine, the team is more important, you head is stuck in your lion. I'm just being dumb."

"It's not." He says before he can even really think of a way to explain it. "I'm... still working on bonding with it. The lion. I... I don't understand it very well."

"Blue says she likes me, and we're in sync, so I leave it at that. She's caught me every time I fell." Lance admitted.

Shiro runs a hand through his hair. "I... the only reason Black even works with me is because the four of you look to me as leader, I... I don't know anything else about it, other than what I'm supposed to do to get the five of us to form Voltron. I've only ever gotten one message from it, and that was for the mouth blade."

Lance nodded, but even as he nods he's realizing that his chance to ask is lost. He sighs and offers a smile. "I'm ready to go out there if you are?"

Shiro frowns, but shakes himself and nods. "Alright, I... I'll follow, I need a couple minutes to think, if you don't mind. I... keep getting distracted."

Lance deflated. He knew this technique. The not leaving at the same time one, so that people didn't think they were together. Why is he so disappointed? "You have to get off me first."

Shiro got off the bed, and ran a hand over his face. "Sorry, I just... need a few minutes to collect myself. I don't need Pidge to ask if I had another panic attack or anything, you know?" He sighs. "Sorry if it sounds arbitrary, I just... don't want to worry her."

Lance pauses. Panic attack? He's never been very aware of anyone's issues but Hunk. "Oh. Yeah, I get it. I'm just, I'm still gonna go." He isn't planning on dealing with any of the other paladins, and not even the idea of his best buddy Coran can call to him now. "Okay?"

Shiro waves his hand, and sits back down on the bed. "Yes. You just... looked upset. I wanted you to know it wasn't your fault I needed a minute. Alright?"

Lance nods, then pauses. "Hey, you never actually touched me with the um, the G-tech arm." He points at it, unsure of the right way to refer to it. "I'm not scared of it, just so you know." He stands and tries to fix the rumples in his outfit.

Shiro froze, and glanced up at Lance before looking back at the mentioned arm. His good arm fell into his lap and he made a small noise of assent. "That's... good. That you aren't."

Lance kind of wanted to scream. What was he doing wrong? "So um, don't worry about it. I trust you not to, you know, do anything."

Shiro huffed. "I... I trust you, too. You're fine, I'll just..." He trails off again, and flexes the hand like he's never seen it before. Like he's not sure how it works. He actually isn't sure how it works, other than the fact that aside from the actual sensation of touch he's pretty sure it works the same way his old hand did. That probably scares him more than if it did have weird behaviors.

Lance looked at the hand too, admittedly with a bit more admiration. It was cool, to him, the tech they were now surrounded by 24/7. He may not have been as good with the technical aspect of space, but he could pilot a ship, he could understand how one functioned, and he may not have been able to say or personally put it back together, but he still knew. He'd taken the same classes as Hunk and Pidge. But Shiro's arm? That was something else entirely, and he wanted to know more.

Shiro bit his lip, as he studied the arm. It felt like a liability, to him, that he didn't know how this arm worked. That he didn't know if the Galra could control him with it or not. It was a great tool to hack into them with, but... it felt like a double-edged sword. Any time he accessed their information with it, there was a chance they could access his information right back. He didn't know what he was doing with it, just... thinking about interfacing with technology and somehow doing it. None of it made sense to him, and he wouldn't be able to tell if he was given corrupted information or not, either. He couldn't read Galran.

Lance shook his head, trying to think about something other than the arm. "Yeah, I'll go." He coughs, stepping towards the door. "Okay?"

Shiro nods distractedly, humming. He flexes the hand again, and then uses the other one to wipe his face tiredly. "I'll be there in a minute or two."

Lance bites his lip, stepping toward the door and triggering it to open. "I'm not actually going to the group yet, just thought you should know."

Shiro nods again. "Of course. Good... good luck, with whatever you're doing." He presses his face into his good hand, and drops the prosthetic into his lap finally. Time to stop thinking about that.

Lance hesitates, but then he goes back to Shiro and steals a little kiss, heart hammering in his chest. He knew he shouldn't, but he wanted to do it and he had horrible impulse control so he might as well.

Shiro blinks, and then smiles at Lance a little gratefully. The peck was actually very helpful in getting his mind off of things he didn't want to think about. He isn't sure if he's supposed to kiss Lance's cheek or something in return, and instead just... pats his arm with the normal hand.

Lance turns and steps out of the room, not sure what he's actually feeling anymore. He's awkward and tired and messy, and all he wants is to go take a nap and forget anything ever happened. Was that an option? Could he just forget everything? He passes Keith and grimaces to himself, realizing that it probably wasn't an option.

Shiro meets Allura to talk about whatever it was she'd needed two or three minutes after Lance left, an apology for taking so long falling out of his mouth without a thought. He felt bad that he'd had to leave her waiting, but... he didn't regret trying to help Lance, even if they didn't get anywhere useful. At least Lance knows to come to him for anything he might need, now.


	2. Chapter 2

Lance managed to stay away for a record 3 weeks. He didn't ask for any more kisses, he didn't touch Shiro unless it was absolutely necessary, and he didn't stare at the mouth attached to the man his heart was currently fluttering for. He felt like a kid in school again, looking at upperclassmen like figureheads of perfection and attraction. He didn't want to lower Shiro to "just a pretty face", but as each day passed it got harder and harder to keep to himself. He struck out at Keith, Pidge, even Hunk. Allura herself wasn't safe from him. Finally he just... he gave in, accepted that he was weak, and went to Shiro's room, knocking on the door late one night.

Shiro had been pacing, still in uniform. His helmet was sitting on the bed, almost forgotten. The knock pulls him out of his own head suddenly, and he takes a second to wipe at his face and make himself look less... manic. He opens the door slowly, and can't stop the slight smile at seeing Lance. Though how upset Lance looked made the smile fade into worry. "Is everything alright?"

Lance wrung his hands. Shiro was still in nearly full gear, while Lance was down to just sweatpants and a loose white and blue Altean-style shirt Coran had made for him. He didn't know what to say. "Can I um, come in?"

Shiro steps back, holding the door open and nodding. "Of course. Something on your mind?" He's worried, now. Lance had seemed to have been doing pretty well for 3 weeks after their conversation, even though a part of Shiro had been a bit disappointed no more kisses seemed forthcoming. Kisses were nice. He frowns a little, and waits for Lance to step in before closing the door. "Do you need my help with anything?"

Lance steps in and closes the door with his foot, the bottom of the lion slipper folding against the cold metal. "Yeah, kind of, I guess? I don't know."

Shiro nods. "...alright. Do you have a question or something? Or would you just like to talk?" He doesn't want Lance to think he doesn't care about him, he just wants to make sure Lance knows he's there to help. There doesn't have to be questions, but he'll be happy to help solve them if they exist.

Lance finds his resolve wearing thin. He doesn't know how to ask for what he wants, so he finally deflates and manages "Can I have a, uh, a kiss?"

Shiro blinks, and then smiles a little. "Of course. I told you, all you had to do was ask." He isn't 100% sure, but... that's not exactly what Lance had wanted to ask, he thinks. He's not sure how to get Lance to actually ask whatever it is, though. There must be something stopping him, but Shiro doesn't know what it is.

Lance steps forward, looking Shiro over. He stops though at seeing all of the reminders of how shitty he's been in the past few weeks. He'd been stressed and upset and while Shiro hadn't caught on, everyone else was tired of the tirade. "Why are you still in full..." He gestures over it.

Shiro blinks. "I stepped into my quarters to think. I'd planned to head back out to the training rooms once I was done. I tend to stay in uniform, or at least try to. You never know when we could be attacked or need to go on a mission." He ran the good hand through his hair, and laughs a little self-consciously.

Lance wants to laugh with him, but he just doesn't feel that. "But when do you just relax?"

Shiro pauses. "I... There's always something to do, something that needs my attention. I need to be ready in case of an attack or anything, any relaxing I do is usually during meals or with the rest of the team. I also read some things for Allura, but that hasn't happened much these past couple of weeks."

Lance glanced around the room, noting how tight it seemed. "You need to be able to calm down too. Here, just... get out of the suit, okay?"

Shiro frowned, and pulled the armor off of his chest slowly. He made no move to pull of the black undersuit, mostly because... in the uniform, he couldn't see the prosthetic as well. It didn't stick out as obviously when both hands were covered in armor and gloves. It didn't feel as wrong. He peels off the shoulder pads next, unsure of what he's supposed to be replacing them with. They only came here with the outfits they arrived in. He didn't exactly have a lot of choice in clothing.

After a few seconds of watching Shiro, Lance blinked and flushed. "Oh, I totally forgot, let me just... I'll come right back, I need to get you some stuff. Okay?"

Shiro laughs a little, and nods. "Okay. I'll be here. I've got shoes, and I'm sure my pants will be fine for today. I'll wait for you to bring a shirt though, alright?"

Lance is already heading back to his room, with plans to hit Coran up too. He'd mostly guesstimated when it came to size, but he was fairly sure the knitted sweatpants would fit Shiro as well as his own fit him, or as well as Hunk's had fit him. He snatches up the black and red pants and dashes to Coran, and it only takes a little bit of whining and begging to get him to hand over the sets of shirts he'd made Shiro, as well as the bag he'd made for Lance to hold his knitting supplies. He kisses the old man's forehead before he leaves, not thinking too much about it. He knocks on Shiro's door a good half hour after he'd left with his foot, arms full of stuff.

Shiro opens the door, all of the armor except for the stuff on his prosthetic arm from the elbow down has been removed. He smiles a little, and opens the door a bit wider. "Is that everything you needed?"

Lance shuts the door with his foot again, letting the slipper flop off and get stuck in the hall outside in his hurry. "Yes. I don't know how they'll fit but," He grins and shoves the bundle at Shiro, picking the bag off for himself. "Here."

Shiro blinks, and takes the bag easily enough. He drops it on his bed so he can sort through it, a bunch of shirts that look about the right size, a pair of pants. He smiles a little, and huffs softly. "Thank you, Lance. Did you make all of these? Where did you get them?"

"I made the pants myself, but Coran did the shirts and the bag. But see the embroidery on the sleeves and collars?" He points. "My idea. He loved it."

Shiro nods, picking up one of the shirts to study it. "It's a nice design. Thank you, I'll thank Coran myself in a bit. I'll uh... get dressed." He finishes pulling the armor off of his arm, and slips the gauntlet off last. The black bodysuit is unzipped, when he pauses to glance at Lance. "...ah. Would you mind, er... turning away for a minute or two? I... I'd rather not..."

Lance had been standing there, watching how he did it, but the question makes him turn bright red and look furiously away. "Yeah, I um, sorry, fuck."

Shiro sighs a little. "It's fine, don't worry about it, I just... Privacy." He coughs, and finishes removing the suit so he can pull on the pants and shirt. It... bothers him a little, that there don't seem to be any long sleeved options. He contemplates the gauntlets as he pulls on the single fingerless glove he still had.

Lance nods, hand falling to touch his own stomach as he wonders how he'd feel if everyone stared at him when he changed. "I get it."

Shiro hums again. "Alright, you can turn back." He runs his prosthetic through his hair, just to keep it moving at out of sight. He feels exposed a little, but the shirt is nice and well made. He'll still think Coran for them.

Lance turns, sighing in relief when he sees that the pants fit. "Everything work well enough?"

Shiro nods. "It all fits. I don't usually just wear short sleeves, though." He admits, and smiles a little. "I suppose I can get used to it, haven't really had much of a chance to change up the wardrobe. Thank you again, Lance. Didn't you ask for a kiss earlier? I'm sorry for distracting you."

"It's fine, it isn't that important. I just..." and back to being unable to talk, he wishes he knew the words to just say 'I want a relationship with you'.

Shiro's smile falters a little. "Is everything alright? You know you can talk to me about anything, right?"

Lance deflates and sits down heavily on the bed. "I don't know."

Shiro sighs, and shoves the clothing to the side so he can sit next to the other paladin. "Why don't you just... talk for a bit? Doesn't have to be relevant to anything, just get something off your chest. I can... talk a bit as well, if you like?"

Lance let himself lean heavily on Shiro. "It's stupid, it's always stupid. I talk all the time but I never have the words, why can't I just say it?"

"I'm not very good at articulating myself, either. Perhaps writing it down or saying it in another language would help? I only speak two, but... it helps me to speak in Japanese sometimes, just to help make things make sense."

"I know what I want to say, I just don't know how to make it right. Because you're," He gestures at Shiro. "And I'm just this."

Shiro blinked. "I'm... I don't know what you mean, exactly, but you aren't 'just' anything. You're a great pilot and a fantastic paladin. You might be a bit reckless but you're not the only one and your heart is in the right place." He pulls Lance closer for a one-armed hug. "Ask me what you actually want to ask me. I want to help, to make you feel better. Alright?"

Lance sighed, nodding and trying to find the words. "I um, I want... more than I should. I ask for too much, and that's my issue."

Shiro frowns. "How do you know it's too much?"

"Because you... it's about you."

"And shouldn't I be the one who decides how much is too much? At least in relation to myself."

"If I asked for it you'd give it to me. You wouldn't actually want it. You just... Shiro, you give and you give but when have you ever taken? I don't want to just be given things."

Shiro opens his mouth and then sighs. "I... Lance, anything I've done so far has been because I feel guilty. I got captured and I hurt Matt and I lost Dr. Holt and I just... I need to make up for it. But whatever you ask, if I give it, it'll be because I want to. It's something personal, I'm assuming, and... if I really don't want to give it to you, I'll let you know. Alright?"

Lance glanced up at him. "Really? Like you actually will?"

"Of course. If I don't want it, I'll tell you. If I say yes, it's because I want to say yes. I swear." He crosses his heart with his prosthetic, not even really registering at first. His smile manages not to falter when he does realize. It's fine.

Lance sighs in relief, and he looks away at that. "Fine. But... don't do anything out of pity, or because you feel obligated to." He pulls back to sit up straight. "I'm... um, I like kissing. I know that's what I asked for, right? But I want more than that, kinda. A safety net."

Shiro frowns. "The only reason I put kissing on the table is because I like kissing. Pity kissing isn't a thing I'd do. But... explain what you mean by more?" He turns more toward Lance, prosthetic brushing his hair out of his face and then staying there, out of his line of sight.

Lance flushes and brings his legs up to cross them and press the heels of his hands to his calves. "Well, um. I want to be able to cuddle? And I want to flirt and stuff." He shrugs. "Like, dating and stuff?"

Shiro blinks, and thinks it over for a few seconds before smiling. "That sounds... nice? I haven't done anything... relationship-y since... long before Kerberos, really, but... I wouldn't mind trying? Cuddling sounds really nice, and... well, I might not be the best, but I'd say I'm pretty good at flirting in Japanese, sō no utsukushī to omoimasen ka?" (don't you think so, beautiful?)

Lance blinks at him. "Okay, Hunk was the weeb, I don't actually know what that means." He grins though. "But if you're flirting at me then, no me diga? Try some more, amor?"

Shiro snorts. "I haven't used a pick-up line in years, but, boku wa kangaeru koto ga dekiru yuiitsu no koto wa anata no kao o hokan suru kotodeareba, anata ga kinishinai negatte imasu. Sore wa boku ga kotoba o tsukutte imasu." He managed to rattle off the words with a fairly straight face, smile tugging at the corners. His voice got a little higher as he settled back into the other language, words also coming out faster as well. It'd been too long since he'd spoken in Japanese to anyone but himself. (I hope you don't mind if the only thing I can think of is to compliment your face. It's made me speechless.)

Lance stares at him, eyebrows rising. "Ah, really? Tus labios son hermosos quiero besarlos." He replies, waggling his eyebrows. Then he taps Shiro's lips. "Tienes una sonrisa muy bonita. Use it more?" (Your lips are beautiful I want to kiss them.) (You have a pretty smile.)

Shiro blinks, "G-gomen'nasai, boku- ah, I mean, I have no idea what you just said." (V-very sorry, I-)

Lance laughs and leans forward for a short kiss. "It's nothing, okay?"

Shiro hums into the kiss. "Are you sure? I should probably translate what I said to you, but it would lose what little romantic meaning it has if I did."

Lance hums back at him. "I'm sure. I don't really want to know what you said, like, no me diga the way it was intended." He jokes.

"...What does that mean? You said it earlier, but I have no idea what it's supposed to be telling me. You're speaking Spanish, right?"

Lance nods. "No me diga is a phrase, it means two things. Either it means 'don't tell me that', which is the literal meaning of it, but it usually is used in a gossipy 'you don't say?' way." He smiles. "So when I lean in like this and say 'no me diga'!" His voice rises. "I mean 'you don't say' and I'm asking you to tell me more. If it's flat and solemn, like 'no me diga'." He leans back and makes his voice sound almost scared. "Then I'm telling you to stop."

Shiro nods. "Ah. naruhodo." He smiles a little. "That sounds like a lot of phrases in Japanese, actually. Context changes the meaning of the words." (I see.)

Lance nods. "And I don't know most of what you said, but I'm sure I'll never have to slip into 'don't tell me that' territory."

Shiro huffed. "I'm sure I'll pass a boundary some day. I try to keep from slipping in front of Keith, though. Korean has a lot of similar words that mean very different things. We can recognize that we're saying something, but we can't really communicate."

Lance laughs at that. "Of course mullet-head has similar words that mean different things. He's difficult like that."

Shiro gently pats the back of Lance's head. If it were a little bit harder he could've called it a cuff, but he didnt hit that hard. "Shh. Keith didn't pick his native language any more than either of us did. You should hear the things K- Pidge can say. Her brother liked to speak in Russian, and I think he taught her some."

Lance snorted. "Russian? Nah, that can't be it, can it?" He asked. "Pidge said it was something else."

Shiro shrugged. "I... remember Matt mentioning Russian. He didn't learn it from their parents or anything, but I remember him talking about it. Of course, everything's kind of jumbled, so maybe I have it wrong."

Lance shrugged. "Whatever, does it really matter? We can ask Matt when we find him or Pidge when we care." He smiles. "Because I don't care right now. H- she threw a shoe at me yesterday."

Shiro huffs softly. "I can ask later, it'll bother me if I don't find out. I don't want my memory to be... any more wrong than it already is." He scratches the back of his neck.

Lance hums in response, reaching out and grabbing Shiro's face tenderly, pulling him in for a slow kiss. It feels better to have mentioned, with words, what he wanted, but he's still not entirely sure where they stand.

Shiro made a noise in the back of his throat, before humming back and leaning into the kiss. The good hand comes up to cup Lance's cheek. He hasn't been in a relationship in over a year and a half, maybe more, but he likes where this one is going. It feels... nice. Good. Lance is good.

Lance, after a few seconds, sits up on his knees to wobble up into Shiro's lap, because it was easier to kiss someone when you were completely facing each other.

Shiro lets his hand trail down to Lance's hip, to keep the younger male from falling or anything. Lance still weighed like nothing, his worries were completely founded.

Lance pulls back after a second. "Can we cuddle?"

Shiro hums. "Of course. On the bed? I'd need to move the clothing... somewhere."

Lance leans forward around Shiro and picks up the clothing, tossing it over his shoulder and onto the floor. "Tada."

Shiro stares at where the clothing was for a second before gently transferring Lance from his lap to the bed so he can pick up the clothing. If he doesn't take care of it now he won't ever take care of it and he'll hate himself later.

Lance covers his mouth to hide the whine at how _easily_ he's moved again, tucking his legs under him and trying not to make any telltale noises. He swallows, watching Shiro bend over and... yeah, that was nice.

Once Shiro has moved the clothing from the floor to the... floor of a closet he happens to have, he stands up and turns back to Lance with an apologetic smile. He isn't actually in the mood to hang things, but at least this way his room will **look** neat, and therefor won't make him feel bad later. "Sorry."

Lance shakes his head, and is he blushing? He's probably the color of mullet-head's lion. "It's," he coughs. "Fine."

Shiro nods, and steps back over to the bed. "Mm. How do you want to... cuddle, exactly? What position...?" He doesn't know how to finish the sentence, so just lets it trail off.

Lance glances down at himself and kicks off his socks and, after a second, wiggles out of his sweatpants. Then he slips under the covers and holds them up, looking innocently at the owner of the bed. "Like this."

Shiro blinks, and there's a blush spreading to the tips of his ears, but he gets into the bed next to Lance, and wraps his good arm around Lance's waist. "Like this?"

Lance nods, tucking himself against Shiro. He wonders for a second... "Are we dating?"

Shiro hums. "Didn't you want to be?" He's not sure how else to answer. Wasn't that what the question earlier had been about?

"Well, yeah but. Are you my boyfriend?"

"...If you want me to be? Am I... missing something?"

"I want to make sure you want stuff too. And how'm I supposed to know what we are if I don't ask?"

"It's good to ask. I already agreed to dating, but it's good to ask." Shiro hums, and settles into the bed a little more. "Is there anything else bothering you?"

Lance shrugs, sliding against Shiro a little more to try to get warm, pressing his toes against the other's leg and burying his hands under Shiro's shirt, pressing his cold fingers in for warmth. "No?"

Shiro grunts, and shifts a bit in the face of all the squirming Lance was doing. "...Un. Forgive me, I haven't cuddled in a... long while. Do you want to talk, or... is something else going to happen? I'm... lost."

Lance presses his nose to Shiro's chest next, right above the neckline of the shirt so he can try to warm up. "We can talk, yeah." He coughs. "I don't know where to start it."

Shiro hums, and thinks for a few seconds. "We could talk about... well, common interests? Our friends? The plan? ...Anything?"

Lance blinks, still burrowed into Shiro. "Hmmm. How old are you? I know you already graduated from the Garrison and stuff."

"Twenty-three. I'd only graduated a couple months or so before... before." He sighs softly and shifts a little closer. "You can't be any older than Keith, can you? I know exactly how old Pidge is, but..."

Lance might pale a bit. "Wow, I'm really taking after Mama here." He laughs softly, pressing more of his face into Shiro. "Mmm. Yeah. I think Keith's my age."

Shiro hums softly. "...Un. That's not... too young. Old enough to be a pilot in the Garrison, old enough to do anything else." He feels a little bad, but... it's not like it's the worst age-gap he's ever seen. Pidge's mother was a good 9 years older than her father, and the two of them were happy.

Lance shook his head. "Yeah, atleast I'm not as young as Camilla when she started." He snorts, but he's already feeling drowsy from the warmth. "Are you a heater?"

Shiro blinked. "What? Sumimasen? What is that supposed to mean? What?" (Excuse me?)

"Like, your body." Lance snuggles closer to him. "Why does everyone but me get to be warm?"

Shiro pauses, and then shrugs carefully. "I don't know? Maybe... maybe it has something to do with your lion?"

Lance mumbles something, but it's lost as he starts to doze off.

Shiro hums softly, and feels himself relaxing too. Having someone sleep against him was more relaxing than he'd expected, and he ends up nodding off as well.

Lance didn't quite dream, because he wasn't entirely asleep, but he wasn't fully there either. He never actually managed to sleep well unless he had his sleepmask, atleast.

Shiro has a nightmare, as he does almost every time he's tried to sleep since getting rescued from the Garrison. There were flashes of Matt and Dr. Holt, screaming aliens and pain and a laughing hag standing over him. He doesn't realize he's screaming.

Lance jerks at the noise, yelping and grabbing desperately at Shiro. "Up! Wake up- what's wrong?"

Shiro scrambles backwards, not-quite awake. He's stopped screaming, but he can't speak just yet either. Well, can't speak English. He's babbling to himself in Japanese, a mantra he'd picked up while in the cells; "Subete wa bakkin ni narudarou. Subete wa bakkin ni narudarou. Subete wa bakkin ni-" 'everything's going to be fine', over and over again.

"Who died? What happened?" Lance shook Shiro's shoulder, anxiety building up in his stomach at how freaked out the other looked.

Shiro didn't register Lance's words, just buried his face in Lance's shoulder with a terrified "doctor holt!" because his nightmare had involved the man- the Galra had carted him off and Shiro remembered hearing mutterings of torture or worse. He clings to Lance to make the terror go away.

Lance automatically slides his legs around Shiro's hips, swallowing heavily. "Wait, what? Seriously?"

Shiro doesn't answer, not sure what Lance is talking about. He just presses a little closer and mutters apologies into Lance's shoulder. They're garbled and half in Japanese, but they're there.

Lance makes a small noise at him. "What are we gonna tell Pidge?"

"...what?" Shiro pulls back, confused. "Pidge knows her family is in the hands of the Galra already?"

Lance narrowed his eyes at Shiro. "Did you already forget what you just said?"

"...um... yes?"

"You said that doctor holt was dead."

"What? I'd remember saying that. I... said his name, but I didn't say he's dead."

Lance blinked. "But I asked who died and you said 'Doctor Holt!' Sooo." He shrugs.

Shiro blinks. "I... didn't hear you say that? Or didn't register it. I was just... upset with what I remembered happened to him."

Lance pressed his nose against Shiro's neck again, whining under his breath. "What did happen again?"

"He wasn't fit to be in the gladiator program, so they moved him to a different branch. I remember hearing guards mutter about torture." He presses closer to Lance. "I couldn't do anything to help him, without putting Matt in danger."

Lance's shoulders fell. "So... did you help them or hurt them, in the long run?"

"...I don't know. But I... I kept Matt alive as long as I could, until it was his turn in the gladiator ring and I nearly cut his leg off to take his place."

Lance winced. "Well, we'll find them. Okay?"

Shiro hums softly. "I hope there'll be something to find."

Lance hit him gently. "Of course there will be." He yawns. "So, the," another yawn follows it, and he closes his eyes and leans more heavily on Shiro. "Nightmare. That normal?"

Shiro hums softly. "...yes. It's hard to sleep fitfully when you're sure you're going to die soon, or you're remembering terrible things you've done."

Lance snuggles up farther, removing his nose from the warmth to sneak a kiss to Shiro's jaw. "I'm sorry."

Shiro presses a kiss to Lance's hair. "Shh, it's not your fault. You don't have anything to apologize for."

Lance hums at him, kissing again. "I can apologize if I want to, Shiro. Hey, what's your first name again?"

"...my given name is Takashi, but Shirogane is usually written first."

Lance hummed in surprise. "Yeah, Hunk watches anime, I know the Japanese naming function. Did anyone ever call you that?"

"My o kaasan called me Takashi. Some of my older friends called me Kashi, but mostly it was Shirogane or just 'Shiro'."

Lance stole another kiss. "Kashi? That's cute."

Shiro hums softly, and leans his head back a little. "I wouldn't mind being called that, or Takashi, again. Although it might confuse Allura and Coran."

"Well, now I have to do it." Lance snickered. "Kashi."

Shiro snorts. "Sure you do, Lance."

"Did you mind everyone giving you a nickname off your last name?"

"No. It was more polite to call me by my family name over my given name, and the nickname is nice. No one else in my family goes by 'Shiro'."

Lance nods. "Is it ok for me to switch to the other one? I know I'd flip if people started calling me Sanchez."

Shiro shrugs slightly. "I don't mind it, and... well, we are dating. That does usually mean you'd be closer to me than our other friends."

Lance blinked in surprise before snuggling closer, burying all of his cold bits in Shiro. It felt nice to hear it. "And if it catches on, and the others start calling you it?"

"...I won't mind. Everyone here is... a fair bit closer to me than anyone at the Garrison was, and Matt only called me Shiro because his dad looked at him funny if he said 'Takashi'. Dr. Holt had only ever known me as 'Shiro'."

"Were you close with Matt?" Lance asked. "Did you guys go to school together?"

"Yeah. He was in a couple of classes, I knew him and Ka- Pidge before Kerberos. He also suggested I tutor some of the cadets, but I didn't get around to anything formal."

Lance hums at him. "Was he cool?"

"Of course. We... even dated, for a few years. Broke up before Kerberos, though. Matt's a pretty great guy, honestly. The mission wasn't even that awkward."

Lance smiled at him and kissed his jaw. "You dated Pidge's brother?"

"...yeah. Probably why she believed I'd really hurt the guy, you know? We were exes, of course I'd actually stab him."

"Did you actually stab him?" Lance asks, yawning slowly. He was still pretty tired.

"Well, I mean, there was stabbing to be had, but it wasn't malicious. I... had to, to protect him and ensure he'd meet up with his dad again. I actually yelled the phrase he used to break up with me when he asked me if I was being serious. He started laughing, and I think we scared the other aliens."

"What did he say when he broke up with you?"

"I'm Scooby-Dooby Done with you."

Lance snorted in surprise. "Seriously?"

"Yes. He's been saying it since elementary school, if his sister is to be believed, and he felt the need to preface the breakup with it too."

"That's..." Lance pulled back a bit. "I've never broken up with anyone in a fun, inventive way. All of my breakups were harsh."

Shiro shrugs. "Matt's a fun, inventive guy. That's just how he is. He's a good friend, too."

Lance nods. "Hey, Kashi?"

"Hmm? What is it?"

"I know cuddling was my idea, but I'm actually really tired and I can't sleep without stuff in my room." He sits up slowly, playing with the blanket. "Can I go?"

"Of course, I need to do a couple things anyway, I don't want to keep you up." He pats Lance's arm lightly. "Do what you need to."

ance nods and climbs over Shiro to stand, yawning loudly. "Boyfriend. Been a while since I had one." He offers a smile. "Thank you."

"Of course. See you later, Lance. It's been a while since I had one either."

Lance leaned down and kissed Shiro's forehead before grabbing his pants and heading out.

The second he steps outside, he runs into Keith. He's painfully aware of how little clothing he's wearing, and balls his pants up in front of his crotch. "What do you want, mullethead? Couldn't find anything better to do in your coffin, so you decided to creep outside of Shiro's room?"

Keith rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. "It's illegal to walk in the hallway where I live too now, do you have any idea where to stop?" If he sounds annoyed it's because he is.

Lance puffs up his chest. "I don't have to deal with you right now. We can fight in the morning, I have better things to be doing."

"But you started it!" Keith replies, exasperated, as Lance starts walking away from him. He groans loudly and looks up at the ceiling, grumbling to himself. "He starts a fight, then he leaves. What's up with him?"

Shiro steps out a few seconds later, to see Keith looking upset and like he needs to hit something. On instinct, he wraps an arm around Keith's shoulders. "C'mon, cadet. Training room, you can punch things there."

Keith bristles at the touch before realizing who it is and sinks to sullenly lean against him. "Can we spar?" He asks, glancing up. Shiro looks... tired. Tired like he'd been sleeping and needed more, which was better than looking tired because he hadn't slept at all. More than that, Shiro looks messy, like he'd been laying around and like he'd been kissed, if the redness of his lips is anything to go by. Keith wants to hit something really badly.

"Of course, I was heading over that way to train myself. You've been training with the bots, haven't you?" Shiro smiles down at Keith a little, and tugs the younger male along. "Are we doing hand to hand or, well, hand to sword? For reference."

"Both." Keith replies, tone clipped. He knew it wasn't fair to be upset but... he couldn't help it.

Shiro nods. "Good idea, it's a good to keep sharp." He smiles a little wider. "Which do you want to start with?"

"Hand to hand." Keith replies, glancing up at Shiro. He hasn't caught on- and Lance thought he was slow.

Shiro smiles. He's assuming the snappy responses are because Keith is upset. He doesn't know why, but... maybe he'll find out. "Alright. Go ahead and set up, I'll get a couple water bottles for in between."

Keith nods and heads to the training room, trying to breathe more deeply and maybe calm down. By the time he has the ring set up, though, he's no less upset, and that makes it worse.

Shiro puts the water bottles down outside the ring and steps in, stretching his arms above his head slowly. "Do you want the first round to be a warm up?"

Keith tosses his jacket to the side and kicks off his shoes, cracking his knuckles. "No."

Shiro blinks, removing his own shoes and nodding slowly. "...alright. It's up to you, I guess. How do you want to decide how a round ends? Incapacitation or a time limit?"

"Incat- incaspi- ic- the first one." He growls out the last word, stretching.

Shiro hums. "Of course. Do you want to make the first move, cadet?" He stretches again, rolling the good shoulder afterwards.

Keith took a few seconds to study how Shiro was standing, shifting into a fighting position and stepping forward. He notices Shiro favoring his left arm and decides to "focus" on it, hoping to fake him out. He steps forward and fakes a punch to the left before bringing a second up from the right.

Shiro notices Keith coming towards his left, and angles his right side away, to keep the more dangerous hand from hurting the younger male. He manages to block the hit and make a swipe at Keith's middle, just to see what Keith's defenses were like.

Keith is jumpy but slow from his anger, and the hit clips his abdomen as he tries to get away. He curses and narrows his eyes at Shiro, aiming a kick at his thigh and sending a punch to his shoulder.

Shiro steps out of the way of the kick, grabbing Keith's wrist and using his right hand to try and get Keith into a choke-hold.

Keith grunts and drops to his knees to try and escape the grab, grabbing Shiro's knee with both of his hands and pulling hard to try and knock him down.

Shiro stumbles, and decides to let gravity pull him down, so that he can try to land on Keith and aim for that choke-hold while he's at it. No one said he had to fight fair.

Keith hadn't expected to be landed on, and he barely managed to flatten himself in time for Shiro to land on him. Keith groans and shifts, still wordless and pissed off and unable to vocalize his issues.

Shiro shifts so he's in a more comfortable position, keeping his right hand on Keith's neck, and hums softly. "That get your frustration out?"

Keith struggles, but Shiro is sitting on him and keeping him pinned Keith lets his head thump to the ground with a loud groan. "No! That didn't help."

Shiro hums. "Well, we're not having round two until you aren't going to try and stab me. So either fix it yourself or talk to me about it."

Keith shifts so that he can get his arms under his face, groaning into them. "I don't want to fix it. I can't fix it."

"Then talk to me. We both know talking helps."

"But it won't get anything done! Stupid Sanchez doesn't understand the meaning of 'fixing things'." Keith might sneer into his arm, so he grits his teeth instead, his shoulder blades tensing.

Shiro pulls the prosthetic off of Keith's neck, so he can gently- maybe too gently- pat his back. "Lance can fix things just as well as the rest of the team. But you know that's not the only reason you're upset. Lance doesn't do that good of a job pushing your buttons."

"He fucking catapulted himself at my button this time." Keith grumbles, unintentionally relaxing just a bit.

Shiro hums, and decides to just give in and massage Keith's shoulders. "Did he now? What exactly did he do this time?"

Keith opens his mouth before tensing and pressing his face farther into his arms. "Next round."

Shiro frowns, and pats Keith's shoulder. "Uh huh? Do you promise not to stab me?"

"Maybe?"

"I'm not getting off of you until you swear not to stab me, cadet. We don't have any druids here to replace lost limbs." He pokes Keith pointedly in the back.

Keith jerks from the term 'cadet', ears heating up. "I won't cut your other arm off."

Shiro huffs. "Vital organs are in the torso. Until you promise, we're stuck on the floor."

"I will try not to stab you! There, are you happy?"

"Good. Yes." Shiro pulls back and stands up, stretching his arms above his head again. He offers the good hand to help Keith stand. "Need help up?"

Keith takes his hand, heart aching. "Fine."

Shiro smiles brightly, and pulls Keith to his feet. "Pull out your bayard, and we can do a bit of practice. You've been fighting drones and sparring bots, you need more practice fighting real opponents who block. Right?"

Keith nods, going to his jacket to pull it out and activate it, lingering for the shortest second to stare at the blade that, by now, feels like a firm extension of himself. "Right."

Shiro hums. "Me too. This'll be a learning experience for both of us."

Keith pauses with his sword in front of him, trying to find a steady pace to breathe at. "Uh huh."

Shiro hums, breathes in slowly, and lunges forward, aiming a punch at Keith's shoulder.

Keith lifts the flat side of his sword to block it as he steps forwards, trying to knock Shiro off balance.

Shiro grabs the blade with his prosthetic, stepping back and trying to get stable footing.

Keith pushes forward before seeing an opportunity and deactivating his bayard for long enough to push forward and swipe at Shiro's midsection.

Shiro stumbles backwards blindly, and activates his hand in order to do damage directly to the younger paladin before realizing that's a really bad idea and swapping to a half-speed punch with his good hand. There's no way Keith will let this connect.

Keith totally lets it connect. He doesn't mean to, but there is now a fist in his cheek and a deactivated bayard in his hand.

Shiro uses the unexpected hit to maneuver Keith into another choke-hold. "You promised no stabbing."

Keith makes a small panicked noise and flails, freaking out despite how gentle the hold actually was. "I didn't stab!"

"You nearly did, and I nearly ripped a hole in your stomach in retaliation. You're lucky I switched attacks at the last second."

Keith whined at him, tugging on Shiro's arm. "I get it, okay?"

Shiro huffs, and pulls back, stepping away. "Alright. I'm assuming that didn't help your frustration any either."

Keith stands up quickly, reactivating his bayard and rubbing at his neck. "No, it didn't." He swallows thickly. "Okay?"

Shiro hums. "Might be better to do hand-to-hand only. I don't want to accidentally hurt you on instinct."

Keith dropped his bayard, it deactivating before it hits the ground. "Fine."

Shiro smiles softly. "You can spar the bots after some frustration's been let out."

Keith sort of lunges for Shiro, his fists lifted and ready to punch but no coherent plans in mind. He's more frustrated from his failures now than he was before, and nothing seems to be helping.

Shiro can see the pent up frustration growing, and decides to be nice and take a couple punches. He'll block the fourth one.

It feels good to hit something, and after the third punch he switches it up a bit by faking another punch to hide the low kick he aims at Shiro's ankles.

Shiro grabs the hand that tried to punch the fourth time, but doesn't see the kick coming and stumbled back.

Keith yelps at the grab on his fist and pitches forward, his own balance lost. He was quick, not stable.

Shiro lets go, and pulls back with a yelp of his own, having to scramble back in an attempt to get stable footing, again.

Keith hits the ground hard, curling in on himself and shaking. There's something wet on his face, and he can't tell if it's sweat or tears. "Why?"

"W-what? I'm sorry I- don't..." Shiro offered a hand to help Keith up. "Why what?"

Keith took a deep, shaky breath. "Why did you pick him over me?"

Shiro knelt down next to him. "What? Pick who for what?"

"I... I..." Keith tenses. "You could've talked to me. Anytime. Why him?"

"...I looked around for you, when I needed it, but the only one I could ever find was Hunk."

Keith took another breath and slowly looked up at Shiro, rubbing his eyes and sitting up. "But... you still could have talked to me. It didn't have to be him." He should say 'Lance', but it's hard. He can't.

"I could never find you when I needed you? I... I talked to Hunk or Pidge when I needed to. There wasn't exactly a choice being made, beyond convenience."

Lance..." Keith manages. "Him."

"Oh? I... he asked."

"What?"

"For help, and to talk tonight. He... just asked. You know?"

"No. Not... I don't."

"He asked for help, and for me. He... aksed me."

Keith looked away. "I... I should get back to it." He swallows. "Okay?"

"Back to what?"

"Practice. I need to get better."

"...I don't think fighting me is helping. You should practice with the bots."

"I know." Keith crawls over to his bayard and stands slowly. "This... this was a bad idea."

"I'm sorry. I thought it would help."

"It's me, not you." Keith stepped toward the control panel to set up what he needed. "You should sleep."

Shiro blinks, and then shakes his head. "No, I'm just going to go get something to eat. Come find me when you're done, I'll use the training room after."

Keith frowned. "You do need to sleep, Shiro."

"I had a nap earlier, I'm fine for a few days."

"Shiro."

"...yes?"

"A nap isn't enough. I... if you promise to sleep more, I'll try to fix it. Me. My issues."

"...I can try. But it's easier to just ignore it, I'm functioning fine, and we need to all be ready for an attack at any time."

"If you don't sleep you will make mistakes and fail. Do you want that?"

"...no. But it's not that I don't sleep, because I do, I just... don't like doing a lot of it at once."

"If you don't sleep for atleast six hours straight, you don't get into the deep sleep and all you do is break your body down. Trust me."

Shiro rubbed his face and groaned quietly. "I... I know, I just... I'm not going back to bed today. Too restless."

"Have you tried drinking tea?" Keith asks. "Allura has some, and I don't really like it but it works."

Shiro shook his head, frowning. "I'll... ask her about it. Thanks for the advice. Go ahead and get back to training, I'll be in the kitchen."

Keith nods. "If you need to find me, I'm in my room or here or with Red, okay?"

Shiro nods and smiles softly, and walks out to find the kitchen and eat something. He'll need it.


	3. Chapter 3

Lance was sitting in one of the many open rooms, lounging with a basket of yarn to one side and half of a sweater to his right. It was quiet, which wasn't usually something he enjoyed but was something that he was currently surrounded by. He glances up at a sign of movement, blinking and squinting through the relatively dark room- he only had one light on, to fool most people into thinking the room was unoccupied. "Yo?"

Pidge leaned against the door jamb, eyebrows raised. "Hey, Lance, can I talk to you?" She twiddles her fingers together a little. "It's kiiinda important, but not too important I guess."

Lance crossed his legs, setting the sweater to the side. "No, it's fine. What's up?"

Pidge steps into the room and crossed her arms. "Well, um, I know you flirted with Allura a bunch for a while, and I don't know how serious you were but I thought it would be a good idea to apologize today. For um, taking her off the market? She and I are dating now. Don't you dare start crying, though!"

Lance moved the basket so he could stand and offered Pidge a hand. "Pidge, bro, high five. Congrats." He grinned. "I'm happy for you."

Pidge blinked. "Uh... wait, you are? What?" She high fived him anyway.

Lance nodded. "Yeah, totally. She doesn't like me, I'm not going to freak out because she picked someone she did like." He shrugged. "Besides... wait, oh my god, I'm totally banging your brother's ex!" His eyes widened. "Wow, did not expect that."

Pidge blinked. "That's ni- wait what? What did you just say??"

Lance blanched and bit his lip. "Can I take that back and you pretend you heard nothing?"

"Oh my god what the hell. I'm gonna kill Shiro!" She threw her hands up, not really meaning it but still feeling like at least punching the older paladin.

Lance grabbed her wrist. "Wait- Pidge, hey, chill! I asked him, okay?"

"That doesn't change the fact that it's totally gross he agreed. You're younger than me! He's my big brother's age! It's gross. And he has the audacity to be the person everybody looks to for guidance. I'm gonna hit him!" She wasn't **really** upset, just a little bit disappointed. Mostly that Shiro hadn't told her, but well, the age gap too.

Lance frowned at her. "Okay, so age is a thing, have you also taken into account that we're in space right now and so far from home that us getting back anytime soon is inconceivable?"

Pidge frowned back. "I know how far away earth is. My mom's there. So is Shiro's. And since we're not going home, shouldn't we hold up the social values of home? Hunk tries to make food like home."

"Pidge, I was two months from seventeen last time we had normal time, so that means I'm like, seventeen. Which basically means everything is fine."

Pidge frowned more. "How do we know it's already been two months?"

"I'm counting the time I got blown up as my birthday because it was the only time everyone has smiled at me at the same time, even though it was relief I wasn't dead."

Pidge blinks, and then has to pull off her glasses and blink back a couple tears. She feels like she's been slapped, even if it wasn't necessarily meant that way. "Oh."

Lance's easy smile falls. "Hey, are you okay? I was joking, compa."

Pidge wipes her face and points at him with the glasses. "You're not allowed to be pathetic. I'm forbidding you from being pathetic, at least around me. Okay? I'm emotional. We were just talking about you and my brother's ex, and thinking about him in those terms makes me think about Matt."

Lance blinks. "Pathetic?" He puffs his chest out. "I'll have you know I am not pathetic, okay? Rude." But he still offers an arm for her to slide under and snag a hug. "And I'm sorry I reminded you of him, I didn't mean to. I... It's only happened for a few days, it's new."

"Allura and I started dating yesterday. You're the first person I've told, I... thought it'd be nice to tell you." She cuddles up to him and not-discreetly-at-all wipes her face on his shirt.

Lance smiles. "I... I didn't think to tell anyone. I asked him, and then we cuddled and took a nap, and then when I was going to my room I ran into Keith and almost got into a fight, so it totally slipped my mind. I didn't mean to keep it from you, I haven't even done anything else with him. I promise, fren."

"Sounds like you." She pats his back. "But if it's true, then that means 'banging' isn't really the right word, huh?"

Lance shrugs. "Sometimes I say the wrong word, Pidge, you know that. I meant more like... smooching and comforting him after nightmares, but I've thought about it."

Pidge nods. "He needs the comfort. And I'm sure the two of you will have fun with the other stuff, but you might wanna check packages before assuming you know what everybody has, right?"

Lance blinks at her. "What? I... oh, do you mean I should tell him? I... Is he the only one who doesn't know?" His eyebrows rise. "Wow."

"Well I mean, you telling him wouldn't hurt, but I was thinking checking his packaging more specifically."

"Now you're not making any sense. Does he have something weird down there? Like... a mole? Or two of them? Oh my god does he have two dicks!"

"...how have you never heard this? Everybody knows about Cadet Shirogane."

"I... have no idea what you're talking about, Pidge."

"Chika Shirogane was one of the Garisson's best and brightest. Everyone talked about her."

Lance shrugged. "Okay, congrats." He blinks. "Wait, what time is it?"

"Uh... I don't know?"

Lance glances back at his sweater. "Well I can knit six inches in twenty minutes so it's been... two hours since I started? And I was supposed to..." He blinks. "I think I need to go see Shiro, actually."

"Go. I'll just... stay out here. I kinda wanna think about Matt."

Lance kisses Pidge's forehead. "If you ever wanna swap sib stories, I had four sisters, okay?" He grins as he pulls back. "And I miss them too."

Pidge rubs her face. "Maybe. Go talk to Shiro."

Lance nods. "Alright." He steps away. "Hey, can you put the knitting stuff in my room? I'm not really going there, and it's a present for Kashi so..."

"Of course. I'll do it later, just to make sure I don't end up running into Shiro."

Lance grinned at her. "I can keep him busy."

Pidge grinned at him. "Have fun!"

Lance nodded back and turned, heading out of the room. It doesn't take too long to get to Shiro's room, but he still hovers in front of the door before lifting a hand to knock.

Shiro had been trying to sleep, the operative word being 'trying'. He gets up to answer the door, and smiles softly at Lance. "Need anything?"

Lance offered a smile and leaned against the doorway. "Yes and no? Are you busy?"

Shiro shook his head slowly. "No, not really." He yawns, and stretches slightly. "Was just trying to sleep, hadn't really managed it. What did you need?"

"Well, if you're up for it, maybe we could do some kissing? Another nap?"

"Sure." He smiles and steps back, to let Lance in. "Lead the way?"

Lance closes the door behind himself, tipping his head just slightly down to steal a kiss.

Shiro hums, and leans forward into the kiss, smiling.

Lance wraps his arms around Shiro's shoulders, and sue him but he likes being tall.

Shiro hums again, and wraps an arm around Lance's hips. He doesn't mind being shorter at all. It's a nice turn around from usual.

Lance deepens the kiss, swaying to some half-remembered beat while he kisses Shiro like his life depends on it. Well... not quite that desperately, but hopefully about that passionately.

Shiro lets his other hand- the good one- cup Lance's face as they kiss more fervently. He smiles a little more, though the idea of sleep is making him sway along with Lance.

Lance takes a step back, towards where the bed is, hoping Shiro will follow him.

Shiro follows easily, and pulls back from the kiss to press one to Lance's neck.

Lance bites his lip to hold back the whine, having to pause. He should chill, but they're totally dating and he's... He loosens his arms and tips his head to give Shiro room.

Shiro hums and decides to suck at the spot he'd kissed. "This ok?" He whispers against the skin.

Lance shivers and leans into Shiro. "D-don't stop."

Shiro hums, and nibbles at the spot gently. He kisses at other spots on Lance's neck too.

Lance internally wonders if someone told Shiro all the ways to make him melt, but he doesn't have any experience with anyone on the ship and Hunk doesn't know details like that. He can't help the moan this time as he leans in, letting Shiro lead.

Shiro pulls back after a bit, and steps back a bit too. "Would you mind if we moved to the," he yawns, having to pause, "the bed? I... need to sit down."

Lance turns, moving Shiro so that he can push him onto the bed himself. He's trying not to let Shiro see how red his face is, but it's a bit hard to do that when he's straddling him and leaning in for another kiss.

Shiro curls the prosthetic around Lance's hips again, and kisses back with a smile. "This still good?"

"Yeah." Lance kisses Shiro's nose. "Can we do more?"

"Of course? What do you have in mind?" He smiles, nose scrunching a little at the kiss.

"Well..." Lance hums. He promised Pidge he wouldn't do anything, but then there had been neck kisses. He couldn't be held accountable. "What do you want to do?"

"I'm good with this? I haven't actually gone much farther than this, Matt and I weren't exactly focusing on this part of the relationship. You know? What are you thinking?" He smiles a bit and presses a kiss to Lance's cheek.

Lance flushes more. He isn't sure if it's because Shiro is adorable or because he's suddenly embarrassed by how much he's done. "I... You kissed my neck, so take care of it por favor?"

Shiro sighs. "I don't know how you want me to take care of it, and I kissed your neck because it's easy to get to. You're too tall for a teenager."

"Shiro, I've been about this tall since I was thirteen." He clucks his tongue. "But I um, I really like neck kisses."

Shiro huffs. "I've been this tall since I hit 16. You're still too tall. I think you're even taller than Dr. Holt."

"Shhh." Lance kissed Shiro's cheek. "Please stop talking about Pidge's dad. She's already upset because I reminded her of her brother, I'd rather not think about them when I'm on your lap and trying to convince you to go for atleast some heavy petting." He pauses. "Wow, that was actually kind of clear."

Shiro laughs. "Talking about them helps you tell me what I need to hear, I'd say I should keep doing it." He presses another kiss to Lance's neck, good hand sliding down his back to maybe get under his shirt or something. Shiro isn't actually sure what he's doing just yet.

Lance shivers, arching his back away from the too-warm hand. He pauses before slowly shrugging his jacket off.

Shiro helps pull the jacket off, humming softly. "This still okay?"

"Yes, si, don't stop." Lance replies, running a hand through his own hair as the other falls to Shiro's shoulder. "Okay?"

Shiro nods slightly. "Alright. I'll still ask every once in awhile, so get used to answering." He lets his hand slide up Lance's back under the shirt, pads of his fingers barely tracing the skin.

Lance shivers again, letting his own fingers slide into the back of Shiro's shirt to try and get warm.

Shiro can't help the soft hum he gives at the feeling of cool fingers on his neck, and he presses another few kisses to Lance's neck while he does.

Lance whines a little, shifting so that he can tighten his legs around Shiro's waist.

Shiro grunts, and tightens his own hold on Lance's hips. He isn't sure what he should do with his good hand, though.

Lance pauses after a second, swallowing. "Can we, um. Do you want?"

"Can we what? We've already been over this, I need specifics. I don't have a lot of experience, most of it was shirtless stuff. Only had the one boyfriend." He kisses Lance's neck to soften the words, he hadn't meant to come off as annoyed.

Lance pulls back and lifts the hem of his own shirt awkwardly. "I've never had to really ask for stuff. I'm not used to leading, okay? But. Do you want shirtless stuff."

"...to be honest, I'm not a fan of being shirtless that much, scars haven't always bothered me, but..." He shifts the prosthetic a little, as if drawing attention to it. Maybe he is. "I'd be fine doing things, if you don't mind going a bit slow. I'll have to work up to everything."

"Well, you don't have to take anything off if you don't want to." Lance shrugged. "And shirts especially aren't really that big a deal. Nothing under there except muscle and" he reached up to pat his own chest. "Stuff."

Shiro blinkes, but nodded slowly. "Alright, if you're fine with it. I... I'm sure it's silly, and I'll get over it eventually."

Lance leaned in to kiss his cheek. "It's fine, you can have whatever issues. I'm just needy, Shiro."

"It isn't good to be so.... jumpy, about the idea of taking off my shirt. It's a silly problem to have, no matter the reason behind it." He grumbled, but turned his head to kiss Lance's cheek in thanks anyway.

"It's fine. You are allowed to be jumpy. Oh la la, I know I'd flip if someone tried to make coffee for me or something like that."

"That isn't... the same." He isn't exactly sure of the specific differences, but he's sure they're there. He kisses Lance's cheek again, and uses the good hand to tug him closer again.

"No, but it's still something. I'm sure your thing is personal, and mine is too. I'm not going to ask about yours." He pulls back just enough to pull his shirt off. He leans against Shiro again then, because he's cold now, like an idiot, but he wants to be shirtless anyways.

Shiro blinks once, at Lance's chest, but takes it in stride. A voice in the back of his head wonders if Lance is aware, before the rest of him corrects it. Everyone at the Galaxy Garrison knew. He just smiles and presses another kiss to Lance's neck.

Lance shudders, freeing his arms to slide them around Shiro's chest. "Keep doing that." He whispers, and why is Shiro always so warm? It isn't fair, but he likes it anyways.

Shiro hums softly, and decides to be a bit of a tease. "Just keep kissing? Nothing else?" He whispers against the skin, pressing a couple more between the words and after.

Lance whines at him, scratching down Shiro's back through his shirt. "Noooooo."

He laughs a little. "But you said..." he trails off, smiling into the skin of Lance's neck.

"I wouldn't say no to more than this."

"Mmhmm. But do you actually want more? Or are you just saying that because I like doing it?" He presses a couple more kisses to different spots on Lance's neck.

"You like doing it?" Lance smiles, heart fluttering. "I was wondering if you were only indulging me because I liked it."

"I didn't know you liked it the first time I did it. I was trying to kiss you at a spot I could actually reach, the reaction was a bonus."

Lance hummed. "Lucky first try, Kashi."

Shiro grinned. "I am lucky, huh?" He nips at the spot he'd just kissed.

Lance yelps, grinding down on Shiro's leg. "Fuck, if you're going to be doing stuff like that you'd better be prepared." He tips his head down. "To take care of it."

Shiro hums. "I'm sure I will be, in fact I'd be happy to. If it'll make you happy, anyway."

"It would. Are you okay with these coming off?" Lance slid his hand down to tug at the waistband on his pants.

Shiro blinks, and then shrugs. "I... yeah, I'd be fine with it. Have to move you first though."

"Kashi, I'm sure you could bench press me and I'd thank you. Please, toss me around like a rag doll."

Shiro blinks a couple more times, and then, on a whim, moves Lance from straddling his lap to draped over one of Shiro's shoulders, so he can stand up and tug his pants down without a problem. He keeps the good hand on the small of Lance's back, to keep him steady, and pauses once the pants are down. "...now what?"

Lance squished the ass in front of his face. "You're still wearing underwear, so..."

Shiro squeaked. "A-ah, right. After that, what do you have planned? Do I just drop you on the bed?"

Lance hummed. "Maybe put me down normally and sit down? I can do stuff or I can get back in your lap."

Shiro hummed, and turned so he could put Lance down, and then removed the underwear. He was a little sad, that he missed the appointment he'd set for after the Kerberos mission, but he'd had no control about what happened. Even if he wanted to. He stands there for a second, wondering if Lance wants him to sit down again.

Lance pushed Shiro down and kneeled down in front of him before finally looking. He blinks at the vagina. It's nice, but not what he expected. "That is not two penises. Penii?"

Shiro blinked, and then laughed. "W-what? You... I'm sorry, I kinda missed my appointment to get one of those."

Lance couldn't help but snicker as he lowered his head to kiss Shiro's thigh. "I don't care about that, Pidge just wasn't really clear. She said something earlier."

"...I thought everyone knew? Some of my teachers still talked about me, or at least they did before the Kerberos mission. Everyone at the Garrison knew about Cadet Shirogane."

"I didn't really know? Or maybe I just didn't think about it. You... you were kinda my hero."

Shiro blinks. "Wh- really? I'm... I wasn't that great. I... seriously?" There aren't a lot of things that could make him blush and stammer at the same time, but Lance found one.

Lance offered a smile, shifting Shiro's thighs so he could sit more comfortably between them. "Of course. You're a young pilot on this huge mission, and you came from the same school I was in. Madre de dios, I didn't know if I wanted you or to be you."

Shiro huffed. "I hope you've figured that out? I... don't think this would work, if you're unsure."

Lance laughed. "No, no, I have. I don't want to be you anymore. That would be very weird, Kashi."

"Good. You're right, it would be weird." He decides to end the conversation there and pulls Lance in for a kiss.

~o~

Lance wasn't entirely sure how they ended up on the planet of genital/appearance-changing-aliens-with-tentacle-hair-and-pretty-eyes-yes-all-six-of-them, but Shiro and Pidge were excited to be there. Lance supposed he was along for... moral support? Witty comments? Googly eyes at the pretty witch doctor helping them out? Yeah, he had no clue. But Shiro had given him pretty pouty eyes unintentionally and he was very very in the mood to see how it worked, despite wanting nothing done to himself. His body might be kinda meh, too long, way too thin, and furiously cold, but it was his. He liked it. So he's sitting on the bench and glancing between his two teammates while the pretty alien talks.

"Your people have already paid the fee, so the work from here on is entirely based on what you want." Her voice kind of purrs and clicks in odd places, her tongue and sharklike teeth warping the words. "But, if you want something native to your own species," She makes a sound like a clucking tongue. "You will have to show examples or be very specific."

"That's why there's three of us. I want this," he motions at Pidge, who pulls her pants down and points at the dick sitting there. Shiro smiles. "And Pidge wants these," He smiles at Lance apologetically, and then grabs the hem of his shirt and tugs it up so that the alien can get a look at his boobs there.

Pidge pipes up then. "Can you make mine bigger than his?"

Lance screeches, pulling his knees up to his chest and pulling his jacket closed. Or, well, trying to. He doesn't get much of a chance though, with the alien- he remembers her name now, Doma, opening his jacket and sliding a hand around one to cop a feel. Well, less like copping a feel and more like gently squeezing and kneading the flesh, getting a sense for how the skin gives way under her fingers. When her fingers hit nipple he flushes and looks away, clearly biting his lip to keep noises in.

"Hm, I see." Doma replies, brushing over the nipple again with the sharper point of her finger. She seems to ignore the sharp intake of breath, instead focusing on the weight in her hand. "Does it simply take more fat and skin to make it larger?"

"All humans have the nubby bit, and yes, mostly. They also have glands that um, produce milk and pheramones?" Shiro rubs the back of his neck, he hasn't had to think about boobs this technically in a while. "I'm not sure how much you'd need-"

She lifts the hand not touching Lance- well, one of the hands, she had four- and cuts him off with a sharper, more guttural cluck of her tongue. "I can see more than just the outside, paladin. I do not need a lesson in anatomy. If I did, I would not be in this position." She moves her hand to squeeze it more firmly, one last time, then slowly pulls her hand back. "Leave those out." She orders, pointing with one of the hands that had been on her hip.

Shiro falls silent, nodding. "Ah, sorry. I wasn't... informed about everything you could do." He rubs the back of his neck again. 

Pidge raises a hand, pushing her glasses up with her other hand. "Do I need to keep mine out too?"

Doma steps up to Pidge, sliding one of her hands down her stomach to gently examine the dick. Much more gently, in fact. She ends up using three of her hands on it, narrowing her eyes at it. "Should I assume you want a bigger one as well?" She asks Shiro, pointing with her free hand at him. "Because this, while suited for her size, is not right for yours."

Shiro shrugs very slightly. "I'd be fine with something small, but you can do whatever you want to it, so long as the biology is correct. You could, um, ask Lance what he'd like? This'd affect him just as much, I think." He glances at Lance as he talks, a little worried. He feels bad, he hadn't really thought to explain why he needed Lance along, just... he'd needed the younger paladin for an example, and now some input.

Lance swallows, shifting awkwardly and feeling very very naked despite the majority of his clothing being in their rightful places. "Um," Doma and Shiro are both looking at him, and what does he even say? "I... Maybe kinda thick? And longish? I don't want it to be too big because guys with big dicks have issues but..." He swallows, face redder than it probably should be. "I um... like stretches?" He pauses. "Oh! Uh, I mean, on me."

Shiro pauses, blinking. "...What?"

Pidge rolls her eyes. "He means it's the stretch of a big dick."

Lance squawks at her, and Doma sighs. "Fine." She curses in Moloran. "Stand and strip the lower half."

Shiro tenses. "Ah, I have the same thing, if you could just check the stretch on mine? They should all have the same, uh, you know?" He doesn't want Lance to be in any more of an awkward position than he's already been put through.

"No, he was specific. Your parts and his won't be the same, the stretch won't be the same." She looks Pidge over one last time, as if committing it to memory, then goes over to Lance, who's slowly pulling his pants and boxers down. She ushers him back to sitting and kneels down. After a few seconds of looking and brushing her fingers over his thigh, she glances up to him and offers a toothy smile. "You're fine, I do this for a living, alright?" Lance just smiles back slowly, and she goes back to looking and gently touching.

Shiro wants to scream, but he doesn't. He runs a hand through his hair, and glances at Pidge. He'd brought Lance down to be a visual aid, and now Lance has had both his top and his bottom molested. Shiro wants to scream.

Lance... wasn't actually upset. Doma's fingers are cold and it feels kinda nice. There's a finger or two barely brushing stuff, and his face is still really red but he's okay with it. He just kinda wanted Shiro to take his new dick for a spin when they get back to the castle. It doesn't take long before Doma finishes and stands, brushing her hands on her capris. "Alright. Now you." She nods at Shiro. "Please remove the pants, I'm doing her first." She steps over to Pidge, pulling the tray of unspecified clear material over to the short girl. "This will feel kind of odd, alright?"

Shiro pulls off his pants while Pidge readies herself for whatever Doma needs to do. Pidge wiggles in place a bit, but settles and nods along once she's ready. "Okay. It won't hurt, though, right?"

"Hurt? Mm, I've never heard a complaint about pain before." She replies, rubbing Pidge's chest with the material. "I have heard 'awkward' and 'weird', however." She starts massaging the skin, the majority of her eyes focusing on her hands but two looking up at Pidge's face. "How does this feel so far? Fine, I hope?"

Pidge nods. "Little tingly. Nothing bad or anything." She fidgets a little.

Doma starts doing something, and before anyone knows it there's a boob on Pidge's chest. "Is this about the size and shape you want?" She asks, eyebrows raised.

Pidge blinked. "Uh. Yeah, it's... yeah, this's perfect."

"You're not going to be able to touch it for a few minutes, the material still needs to set." Doma moves to the other one now, copying her actions from before but with less trepidation.

Pidge nods. "Okay. Wait um... does that mean I won't be able to wear a shirt either?"

"Just until it's set. You don't want it to be shaped oddly, do you? Think... clay."

"I get it. Just um... wondering how we were gonna get back to the castle, if I can't wear a shirt and Shiro can't wear pants."

"I said a few minutes, not forever. By the time I'm halfway through with him," She spares a hand to point at Shiro. "These will be set."

Pidge nods. "Okay. I can work with that."

Doma nods, then glances up at Pidge. "Alright, is this one about right?"

Pidge nods. "Yes. They're not quite even, and they tend not to be anyway. I like it, thank you."

Doma nods. "Alright, as long as you are happy with it." She steps back to admire her work for a second, then steps back toward Shiro.

Shiro shifts slightly and waits for her to begin. He doesn't know how it's going to feel for him, really. Pidge looks happy, though.

Doma turns back to her cart for a second and wipes her hands off, picking up a few bottles and pouring it into a glass. When she's satisfied with the gentle lilac glow, she claps a pair of her hands together and hands the cup to him with another. "You need to drink all of this, it will... I can't explain it, but it will help regulate and fix everything."

Shiro nodded, and brought it to his lips to drink it. Once he's done with it he grimaces a little, but doesn't make a comment on it.

Doma nods to herself, then points at the bench where Lance is still, though he's pulled his jacket around himself more. "Now sit. I don't think you'd want to be standing while I do this."

Shiro turns and sits, nodding as he goes. "Of course." He doesn't know what all is happening, but he feels... a little weird, now. Not bad, just... odd.

Doma brings the cart over before kneeling in front of him, and she glances back at Lance for a second before nodding to herself. "Alright. This one is less reversible. That doesn't change your opinion, correct?" She asks, eyebrows raised and one hand already scooping up some material.

Shiro shook his head. "I'd intended to get surgery to get the same effect over a year ago. Things.. prevented that from happening, though."

She nods. "I'm not sure I know what a surgery is, but I'll assume it's a similar thing?"

"Similar, but uses knives and things. You're usually unconscious for it."

She grimaces at him. "But how would you know if they're doing something wrong?" She shakes her head, making the clucking noise again. "I don't understand other species sometimes."

Shiro shrugs. "There's a lot of talking beforehand. If the surgeon messes up there will be a lot of problems, but it can be fixed. A lot of people tend to just stick with what they were born with rather than what the might want otherwise because of the risks of surgery, though."

Lance coughs next to him, and Doma glances at him. "That sounds incredibly inconvenient."

Shiro shrugs. "We're not a very advanced species. Most of the world thinks that there aren't any other living species in the universe."

"So your planet is filled with incompetence, it sounds?" She asks, beginning to gently spread the material over his crotch.

"Y-yeah, just about. But we're getting there. Give us a century or two and we might have a chance." He doesn't really know how else to phrase it, but he's sure the message is clear enough. Humans progress incredibly quickly, if Allura's estimates on other cultures' progression is anything to go by.

Doma nods. "I understand. Are you feeling any discomfort?"

"Not really. It's just a little... tingly, like Pidge said."

She nods, glad for it. Then she applies more material and starts actually working on making it. "This one will be a bit weird. I wouldn't suggest touching it too much or using it for the rest of the sunlight, but it will be safe to cover." She points with a free hand to Pidge. "And you're good."

Pidge pulls her shirt on immediately. "Do I need to keep my pants down?"

Shiro nods slowly, not surprised. "That sounds fine."

"No, those can go up. And you can redress as well." She points at Lance next, who hurriedly stands and pulls his own up.

Pidge pulls her pants up, and rubs her arms slightly. She's cold. After a second she walks over to press up against Lance (her back to his chest, to keep from mushing the titty), in the hopes of conserving body heat. And maybe just some excited cuddling.

Lance cuddles her back, arms wrapping loosely around her waist and chin slotting into the crook between her shoulder and neck. "Are they touchable?" He asks the alien still working on his boyfriend. Wow, nice.

"Yes, I said she was finished." Doma replies, glancing up at Shiro periodically as all four of her hands focus on molding and shaping.  
"Hey, Pidge, can I touch your boob? Not in a weird way but, it looked really soft."

Pidge leans back against him and hums. "You can do what you want, but Allura gets to play with them shirtless later."

Shiro can't really tear his eyes away from what Doma is doing, because it's kind of fascinating, in a weird way. He's... excited, for this.

Lance snorts. "Lucky Allura." He pats one gently, eyebrows rising. "That is bigger than mine. Like I can see it with my eyes, but..." He whistles. "That is a titty."

Doma rolls her eyes- or well, it looks like she does. "Still no discomfort?" She clarifies, about halfway done.

Shiro shakes his head while Pidge laughs. "I'm fine."

"Lance, I asked for bigger. If they weren't boobs then we'd have had a problem. Oh my god."

Lance whined at her. "I know, but they're still squishy and soft. Probably." He boops it again. "What are you going to do for bras? I don't think pretty alien princesses have bras."

Doma nods at Shiro. "Tell me if there is any, alright?"

Pidge huffed. "Allura has what amounts to bras, I'll be asking Coran for help making some my size. Duh." She swats at him gently.

Shiro nods. "Of course."

Lance lets his hands slide back down to simply hold Pidge. "You cold?"

"Mmhmm." Pidge leans a little harder.

Lance opens his jacket and wraps Pidge up in it too, zipping the front so that they're basically snuggling inside of it. "Better? I know I'm ice cold."

Pidge snuggles up a bit more. "You're kinda cold, yeah. This's nice though."

Lance closes his eyes. "Nice."

Doma pauses at the head for a moment, then nods to herself, looking back at Shiro, who'd been silent for a bit. "Does this look right to you?"

Shiro nods. "Yes, it looks good."

"Are you happy with this? Can you see living with it?"

"Yes. I can."

She smiles and glances back down, studying it for any issues. When she decides there are none, she wipes her hands off and nods. "Alright, now don't touch it for a bit, I'll tell you when it's okay to put the pants back on."

"Of course."

Doma begins cleaning up, leaving them to it.

Lance opens his eyes and turns his head to glance at the dick, then Shiro. "Is it weird?"

Shiro shrugged. "A little. I like it, though."

"Are you happy?"

"Yeah. Yeah I am."

Lance smiled. "Good."

Shiro grins. "Yeah."

Lance blushes and glances away, hiding his face in Pidge's shoulder again. "Yeah."

Pidge pats Lance's arm. "Mmhmm."

Lance shushes Pidge as Doma steps back up, looking Shiro over. "Alright I do believe you're done. Don't use it for the rest of the day, and if you have any problems I'd be happy to fix them."

Shiro nods. "This should be fine. Thank you."

Pidge taps Lance's arm, so she could get out of his jacket and leave.

Lance unzips the jacket and lets Pidge out, standing and stretching. "Pidge, you're so tiny, but you... you weigh so much." He jokes, poking Pidge's arm."

Doma nods at Shiro one last time, then turns to go deeper into the shop.

Pidge swats at him. "Shh you." 

Shiro stands up and pulls his own pants on, humming.

Lance turns to Shiro, stepping forward. "So, we going back to the ship?"

"Yep." Pidge grins, and wraps an arm around Lance's waist. She'd never reach his shoulder. "We can head up, and by tomorrow you two could probably do ~things~." She wiggles her eyebrows.

Lance swats at her even as he wraps an arm around her shoulders. "Hush, gremlin. Who fed you after midnight?"

"Hunk."

Shiro huffs at them. "Shush, you two."

Lance glances back at his boyfriend. "Hmm... no."

Shiro shakes his head, and motions towards the door. "C'mon, let's get back to the castle."


End file.
